I’ve Got You!

With my new found freedom in the evenings, I’m feeling a bit restless. I keep wanting to get out and do stuff, but I’m pretty broke! The family visit, plus medical expenses related to the sleep study and cpap, plus the fridge breaking, plus insurance being due, and a few other things have drained my funds. Sadly, my student loans come due soon too! Never can get ahead. haha. Meh, I’ll live. I’m trying to enjoy summer while its still here. I haven’t been to carowinds much this year – but I’ve been enough to pay off the season pass. Still loving the new roller coaster. If only I could get there a bit more to lay out at the waterpark. I need more of a tan!

Its sad that I don’t have a whole lot to say right this minute. Work is … work. I’m just happy to have my nights and weekends off still. I’ve been playing a lot of video games and thats great in itself. I’m not sure if I’ll have the cash to start guitar lessons, but I’m gonna try like hell! And once I get tired of having this free time, I’ll really buckle down and job hunt + guitar it up + get a certification.

The semester (my final semester) is winding down. This degree is within arms reach! In a matter of weeks I’ll finally have it. One class has already basically ended, so I’m starting to get my time back and its a good feeling. Having free time in the evenings and on weekends is going to be somewhat foreign to me and I’m already noticing that void. I’ll have to focus even harder on making some new friends, though I’m actually somewhat happy because I know I have two people I can count on and I’m working on a third. Its so odd to be counting friends on one hand, but I’m lucky to be able to do that. For a long time I really had no friends and had a ton of acquaintenances. So, unlike some of my “downer” posts, this is more of an “upper” in that I’m looking forward. heh.

I’ve already got some plans for my new freedom. First up is guitar lessons. I started this over a decade ago and didn’t get very far. I don’t actually remember why I didn’t follow through … probably the cost of lessons and all. But once school ends, I’ll be signing up. I’ve already got the guitar (I’m going electric this time) and I’m so freakin ready. I’m tired of playing Rockband and Guitar Hero. I’m also finally getting back in a gym habit. The last couple months have absolutely wrecked me because school was such a pain. I got up this morning at 5 and made it to the gym before work. Now I’m back on my way to abs that someone can lick!

In terms of travel, I don’t really have much in the way of concrete plans for the remainder of the year. I’m headed to Florida to visit with family (super excited!) in a couple weeks and I’ll probably be in New York for work for a couple days in July. Beyond that I’m questioning going to Oktoberfest in GA again. Its great to go and see family, but I can’t ever seem to get a group of my own friends to go, so I think I’ll refocus my efforts. Perhaps Las Vegas again? I’d also like to get up to Cedar Point to ride some coasters or perhaps to Orlando to the theme parks. Maybe to NYC for some shows and shopping. I’m kind of fluid on it all right now. Maybe none of it will happen, but at least I can dream something grand. heh. Speaking of that, I’m in the “talking about” phase of planning a much bigger trip over seas for next year.

As far as anything else goes, I continue to be disgusted by BP, Sara Palin, Joe Jackson, the terms “recession” and “economic downturn,” and poor sleep. The sleep  is something I’m working on since I have my CPAP now. The other things … I’ll just continue to ignore in the media. Why is Sara Palin’s opinion any more relevant than anyone else? Joe Jackson is a sad little man who, in my opinion, continues to try to profit from MJs death. Oh, and F*ck BP for this mess. To be fair, I should add my disgust for the media here too. But, again to be fair, the media only feed us what we want so we have ourselves to blame for sensationalism.

Happy Friday night!

I’ve been terrible about updating here. I think its just … I’m in an extended rut and a few things have just all finally piled on. I haven’t been creative in terms of photography, I haven’t written here, I havent made progress on making friends. I won’t delve in to the friend thing other than to say. I havent made a new friend in about a year now. I can count the number of friends on one hand. I have got to change that.

I feel somewhat beaten. I’m really, really, really, ready for that change I’ve said I’m ready for a bunch of times now. I go to work, get through it, and come home exhausted. I don’t sleep well. Wash, rinse, repeat. I *am* trying to fix it all though. I’m actively seeking change and trying to bring it about. What sucks is that its in other people’s hands for certain parts of it and there isn’t a damn thing I can do other than wait. As far as other  things, I’m at least actively seeking the change AND, after a decades worth of terrible sleep, I am finally going to a sleep clinic. I’m hoping that this will fix my issue with always being tired and, with more energy, I’ll get out a bit more. We’ll see.

In terms of change, I’ll just throw it out that I’ve been actively seeking a new job. I just don’t think the change I want is going to come to my current job. I love my work … but the leadership is just … not what I would have hoped. I’ll leave it at that. I’ve tried giving feedback and everything, but sometimes, you can’t make the impact you want because it involves another person. The sad part is that I’m not alone in feeling that way. I hear so much from others in my organization about how they’re just waiting for change now. Well, I have to make a change for myself or I fear I’ll either go through the motions and be beat or my work will greatly suffer. Neither of those sounds great to me, so I’m working on it.

God this post is extremely scattered. I spent today working on a paper that took entirely too long to write. I’m excited to be so close to finished with my Masters degree! In about six weeks, I’ll be wrapping up classes. Then i can work on certifications and finally get my nights and weekends back!

So, um, I have no good way to end this post. I’m hoping for a lot of positive stuff in the next 30 – 60 days so I can begin a new chapter all around.

1. Knoxville, Tennessee
2. Louisville, Kentucky
3. Chattanooga, Tennessee
4. Dayton, Ohio
5. Charlotte, North Carolina
6. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
7. Greensboro, North Carolina
8. Jackson, Mississippi
9. St. Louis, Missouri
10. Wichita, Kansas

Source: Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America

Well, at least I don’t live in #1 … but still living in #5 doesn’t make me feel much better. The 24-hour versions of Zyrtec and Claritin don’t seem to last more than 8 hours for me. I took 2 Zyrtec at about 930 this morning and just now (around 5:15) i started gettin itchy. Thats the norm for me. So, at least I know I can last 8 hours comfortably.

I’ve just finished the first of three papers that will allow me to end the current term. I’m excited because this means I’ll be starting my last two classes in the next month and then I’ll have my freakin Masters. I still feel like I haven’t had to study all that much. Most of the work comes in the papers. As I’ve said before, I’m sure its very challenging for some, but I haven’t found it to ber overly strenuous since I’ve been working in the IT field for more than a few years. I’ll just be glad to have it so I’m more marketable. I was reading some study that nearly half of all CIOs are looking to retire in the next 5 years. If thats true, its totally awesome and I should be in line for a major upgrade given my work experience, growth, education, and certifications. Upon completion of my Masters, I’d like to focus on a certification to help me along. My next move … if I move … should be the last job switch for quite a while. As long as the pay and the location are right, I’m content to stick with a company for the long haul.

In 48 hours I’ll be close to touching down in Las Vegas! I’m excited about this trip because of the suite I’ll be in for the first half of the trip. I haven’t ever upgraded before. haha. My last visit was in August of last year. Since then, Aria and the rest of Project City Center have opened and I’m looking forward to checking it all out. The one thing that hasn’t (re)opened is the Star Trek Experience. I guess they’ve encountered some issues and there is no news about when or if it’ll happen. Thats sad because it really was a cool experience. Anyhow, I’m looking forward to an awesome time!

Time to shower off the pollen and do some situps!

SO again I find myself in one of those periods where I go to work, go home, do homework, maybe hit the gym, watch a little tv, and go to bed. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. I’ve been trying to break that up though. Last night I went with a few friends to the Charlotte Checkers game. They didn’t win and I didn’t get the free burrito I would have if they had scored 4, but it was a blast. It is nice to be able to break up the weekday monotony sometimes. My weekends have been great lately and thats made Sunday nights pretty bad since I know its back to a mind-numbing grind the next day. But enough about the unpleasant part. heh.

I’m glad that winter seems to be in its final couple/few weeks here. The pollen has already started (uh oh!) and we’ll be seeing warmer weather coming up. Now its time to really focus on looking good in my swim trunks! Likewise, Carowinds opens up again soon! They have a huge new rollercoaster that I’m looking forward to. My little brother has been talking about it a bunch so I imagine he and I will ride it enough to where I’ll get sick of it and he’ll be disappointed because I’ll suggest we also ride the other rides. haha. Not too far off is my Vegas trip too. I love when conferences happen in Vegas. I’ll get to learn some things, network, and have some fun. woo!

My neighborhood Homeowners Association is starting to suck more than usual. People are getting upset with each other and progress is hard to come by. It is amazing that people won’t show up to meetings and then right as we’re ready to act, someone throws a wrench in the works. Much to my fellow board members chagrin, I support the right of these folks to speak their mind and for people to respond, but I hate that it happens. Sometimes I wish I could ignore people, but then I wouldn’t be me.

I spent the last weekend snowed in. I probably shouldn’t have driven in the heavy falling snow to get to Greensboro, but it was worth it. I played Uno, Aggravation, watched Mars Attacks, fixed a computer, played in the snow, drank, ate, and slept all in good company. Memorable weekend. The last few weeks have been so hectic with the start of the new semester at work and with school that I really needed a weekend away. I don’t have a lot to type right now, but I wanted to write down that I had a great weekend because I know I can trend negative a lot when I type. Well – I had a great time, damnit!

One other note: I’m looking waaaaay forward to my spring/summer conference schedule. Looks like Las Vegas, Orlando, Atlanta, and Camden, NJ. Ideally, I’ll be adding some personal time to a couple of these trips so I can enjoy my destinations and then hopefully I’ll be working on some personal trips. I’d like to go backpacking again and steal a weekend to New Orleans or to the beach. We’ll see.

Off to do homework. Ah, the routine.

So far this week has been pretty crazy at work. I’ve been working long days and not really making the stack on my desk any smaller. Every time I get something done, another need pops up. I guess its good in a way, but man I’m tired! On top of that, I come home and one of my roommates is being kind of a dink. I don’t know why, but I hate when people take their personal crap out on me. But its whatever…between the two I’m just looking forward for the weekend! I’ve got some fun plans!

A friend from out of town will be coming in to visit and one of the first things we’ll do is go see a movie. The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, Heath Ledgers last movie, is opening at one theatre in Charlotte so we’ll trek down to see it. I’m sure the rest of that evening will be spent with some good drinks and conversation. A relaxing end to the week. The next day, we’ll head to the newly opened Bechtler Museum of Modern Art. The collection is supposed to be pretty impressive and as I’ve watching the building go up, the anticipation has grown. I’m still looking around for another cheap activity, but between some drinks, video games, and good company I think this will be a great weekend.

School has started back for me. I’m starting my next to last semester. This summer, I’ll finally have my Masters and I can begin the search for my next educational experience. I can’t decide between certifications and a Ph.D or Ed.D program. Hell maybe I’ll just quit and become a traveling hippie. haha. But anyway, I need to get ready for bed. I’m freakin exhausted.

As the year winds down, so does my vacation. I’m trying to make plans for New  Year’s Eve but as with most times I try to plan, the variables (mainly other people) make it extremely difficult. The plans range from drinking at the house to going out to taking a little road trip. Here I am, the day before and still people won’t commit. Thats a real problem lately. Any time I want to do something, I can’t seem to get people on board because they either don’t have the money, time, or balls to lock-in. Its funny because thats the story of my life. Try to organize things, they fall through. Try to date, it falls through. People suck.

As with most things though, I’ll keep trudging through it all hoping to meet some people who are on better footing. Gotta keep trying.

I know I kind of already did a revue of the year around my birthday, but I figured I’d say a few more words. haha. The more I reflect on the year, the more I see that I’ve continued to learn and grow … and mellow out somewhat. I’ve also found that I’ve been wanting more and more to find that group of friends I’ve been missing in Charlotte and someone to fill the other seat in my hot little car. Not that this is anything new, but I have found myself trying a lot harder … and yielding the same results. Theres something wrong in my approach and I’ve been thinking a lot on that for the last couple months. I think part of the problem is that I’m too responsible/mature for my age. Is that even possible? Well, to put it in perspective, I have absolutely no problem making friends and finding dates in people who are a decade or two older than me. Being as thats not what I want, I don’t take those friends or dates. I have quite an easy time talking to people of my own age and within a few years …. and they have quite an easy time disappearing.I don’t feel too terribly awful that people disappear on me. In talking with some others my age, apparently this isn’t all that uncommon. Neither is the disgusting sense of entitlement and me-centric view a lot of them have. But I’ve written about that before. Additionally, I have no problem finding those much, much younger than me. The problem here is general lack of education and life experience … and a penchant for excessive partying and general lack of appreciation for activities that do not include alcohol. I’m not trying to be pretentious here … I’ve graduated from having to party hard day and night. I find it hard to enjoy the company of those who live this lifestyle.

This year I also really started to feel the need to move on to the next chapter. This is driven by my need for a new intellectual challenge in my work and also because I feel that I’ve exhausted my friend options in Charlotte. Essentially, I’m ready to flee and start anew. Again. For the fourth time. I’m working for weak leaders who are set in their old ways. I’m living in a transient city where people come and go and thus the atmosphere is cliquish. I think a change of scenery can be most helpful and uplifting … and thats exactly what I want.

2010: You will be my b*tch. I will own you and will get all of the things I want out of  you because I will make it all happen.

So I’m down to the last work week for 2009. Man I’m soooo freakin ready. The house has lights on the outside, the tree is up, and this morning was freezing cold. I’m about ready for the holiday! During my time off, I’m still toying with doing a little bit of traveling, though that still seems like it’ll be hard. Between the benz and a lack of traveling companions, I may just end up sticking around. I know I’ve mentioned that previously, but I’m kinda bummed about it. In the end, its not a huge deal though. I can still smile and enjoy sleeping, eating, drinking, gym – ing, and playing the crap outta some video games. Anyone feel like meeting in a randomly selected city for a couple/few days?

I didn’t really do a Thanksgiving “I’m thankful for X” kind of post, so I thought I’d take a minute to do that. I’m extremely thankful for the opportunities I’ve had and the people I’ve shared time with (family, friends, more, less) because of the things I have learned and continue to learn from the people and the chances. This year has been full of growth for me personally and professionally as I’ve continued to push to learn outside of work and to step outside of my comfort zone in many respects. I’m thankful for my health and the health of my family and friends as we all travel on this journey. Last, I’m thankful for the life I lead because it is a result of gifts from higher powers and the developmental approach taken by my parents. So … thanks.

I didn’t really have a whole lot to say this go ’round. I’m off to do some Christmas shopping and to laugh at strange people in the mall. As a race of beings, humans really are funny. We do the stupidest things … and then we create malls where we can go to laugh at each other.